An early V-day treat for you, dear readers...

I've nothing but love for my favorite NYC politician Marty Markowitz...but I'm in stitches visualizing the following event...

There was a stuffy fundraiser being held in Brooklyn raising money to send kids to summer camp. Imagine the folks that poney out the bucks (I'm picturing lots of of the silver haired set...) for their rubber chicken dinners. Dessert comes and now the token trinket - Marty thought it would be great to give out fortune cookies with such cutesy statements as: "Brooklyn - The 10th Planet," "Brooklyn - it's more than a freak'in tree," and "Brooklyn - it's like an everything bagel."

Someone, apparently, swapped the order with a porn convention as all the messages were, in Marty's words "Triple X to say the least."

The borough president was on the second floor of the two-level restaurant when a guest "yelled to me from the first floor: `Marty, did you order these cookies? Did you see what's inside them? I think you better get your butt down here!'" Markowitz said.

Markowitz, who was not wearing his glasses, had the "fortunes" read to him by some of the guests. "I'm sure they were meant for a raunchy bachelor party," he said. "They were not cutesy. "

Now that's one rubber chicken dinner I would gladly have attended. Poor Marty, I still love ya!