In Honor of Bond's Hitting 714 Home Runs

As I'm sure you've have heard, Barry Bonds just tied Babe Ruth's Home Run Record. Already many critics are putting an * next to his name in the history books.

A couple of months back, Letterman had some advice as to how Bonds could improve his reputation. I think it merits another look.

Top Ten Ways Barry Bonds Can Improve His Image
As presented by Dave Letterman on 3.28.06

10. Lucky fan gets to inject him in the ass
9. Develop an exit strategy for Iraq
8. Start an erotic blog
7. Change name to Barry the Cable Guy
6. Open retail chain: Big & Tall & 'Roidy
5. Star in one of them "We Have 15 Kids" movies with Bonnie Hunt
4. For every homer he hits, donate 500 bucks to the good people at Balco
3. Auction autographed syringes on eBay
2. Switch from steroids to hookers to become like lovable Babe Ruth
1. For the love of God, give some of them 'roids to the Knicks!