Z. Madison

For when you're relaxing at home or killing company time - Z. Madison's here for you.

7.25.2006

How To Be A Gold Digger, by Forbes.com


I saw on the news last night that Forbes had announced it's annual rundown of millionaires. To add insult to injury of my broke ass, I went on-line to compare my meager agency earnings to the likes of Stern, Gates and Oprah.

Imagine my surprise to actually see the following headline on the homepage:

"How To Land A Rich Man" by Lacey Rose.

Serious Forbes, WTF? I'd expect such lowbrow crap from slutcentric Cosmo or a copycat 'zine, but from you?

Well, of COURSE, I had to click into the article (Disclaimer for The Boyfriend - Simple curiosity, I swear! xoxo - Z.)

Woven into the not so sarcastic piece are a few mind-blowing tips that just set the female race back about 30 years:

*"Upgrade Your Whereabouts": Divine direction to "get your regular cup of joe down in the financial district" Wall Street types have money and hang out in the area? OMG, Who knew?!?

*Stalk the penguin-suited at a charity event. If the letches don't pounce, you can always load up on the free booze and rubber chicken.

*"Matchmaker, matchmaker Make Me A Match!": Pay for some hag to hook you up with a guy who's already in the market for a gold digging wench.

*"So if it's a thick wallet you're after, consider life as a luxury real estate broker, a concierge at a five-star hotel or even a flight attendant--on a private jet, of course." Hey, it's worked on Trump...

*"Like sports? Who cares. Sporting events at the country club--like golf opens or tennis tournaments--are a must for singles seeking wealthy mates." What, the Bleacher Creatures with their $5 seats and snuck-in brewskis aren't good enough?

*"Never approach him; let him approach you. "Wealthy men in particular like to earn what they're getting," she explains. "They like to fight for it, rather than have it drop into their lap." Take that, Diana Bianchi!

*Monica knew best: "Get Political! Join both parties if you must," suggests Sayles. "We're not talking about morality, we're talking about opportunity."

6 Comments:

At 7:50 AM, Anonymous Troy from TODC said...

Does a lady really want rich over looks?

 
At 8:37 PM, Blogger Z. Madison said...

do you really want an answer to that, troy?

 
At 7:01 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Troy, the main things a woman look for in a man is security and leadership. Layin' up with cute boys is fun but at the end of the day we're both broke. Men go for looks, women go for money and all it represents (social dominance, financial discipline, etc. etc.) If you want a dime, stack up ya' paper.

 
At 2:28 AM, Blogger Sabrina said...

Its True! Why waste time on a broke boy? Look would you love your woman if she was 300lbs? Its the same for a woman and a broke dude.

 
At 8:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

@ troy. Hell yes

 
At 12:30 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Females chase rich men for many reason. Yes, most want financial securtiy and yes most rich men date beautuful women cause they are well "men" lol. I have to agree with one writer that cute guys are fun sometimes but looks are onlu skin deep. Girls like security, nice things, and a guy who can make her laugh. At the end of the day that's all most of us care about

 

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