Deathwatch 2007: Smoke Em If You've Got Em

As of Wednesday, if you're caught lighting up in a Paris Cafe, it'll cost you 450 Euros (about $660 with today's exchange rate). France, where one in five residents is a smoker, is extending the legislation introduced in February of this year banning smoking in hospitals, schools, airports and public workplaces to essentially what we have in New York now: No smoking indoors anywhere.

As a smoker myself (who's been half assed toying with the idea of quitting for some time now), I wasn't sure how I'd react when Bloomberg instilled our city's ban back in 2002. I have to say though, I'm thankful he did. I think back now to where you could smoke and wonder what the hell were they thinking? It's so much nicer to go out at night and not have to breathe through a cloud of haze (makes nursing a hangover the next day that much easier, too). And restaurants? My God...world of difference.

So you go outside for a smoke. No biggie.

Ireland, of all places, had the next big banning announcement. If the Irish can do it, we bloody well could was Britian's answer earlier this summer (ironically the day this smoker arrived in Merry Ole England for a vacation). Italy, Spain and Belgium have also instituted bans.

So to France, you're in good company. Embrace the ban. It truly will make life better. Oui, oui.

Deathwatch 2007: Don't Go In The Water

May 16, 2006 - October 9, 2007

You may remember my delightful companion Jaws. For the past year and a half, he's started my mornings out right playfully dancing for his breakfast. He'd always show off for kitchen visitors by darting daredevil laps around his globe.

But last night's stressful and ultimately hopeless playoff loss seems to have broken the little guy's heart, for this morning I came upon a most unwelcome site. My Jaws didn't greet me with his usual twirling. In fact, he didn't so much greet me as lay at an unfathomable angle upside down at the top of his globe. In denial, I even tossed his morning food into the globe and hastily left him hopeful there was some mistake and upon my arrival this evening, he'd be his usual colorful self.

Alas, I've come to terms with my little friend's passing.

Adieu, sweet Jaws.

Thank you for making my mornings and homecomings that much merrier.

Deathwatch 2007: Holy Cow!

The Yankees confirmed today that Phil Rizzuto has passed on to that big game in the sky. He was 89 and remains a baseball legend both as a player (as a leadoff hitter and shortstop for the infamous 1940s/50s Yankee Dynasty) and as a broadcaster. The ever humble Scooter was finally admitted into Cooperstown in 1994 thanks to an persuasive plea from friend Ted Williams.

Besides running constant biographies et al on YES, I'll be curious to see how the Yanks honor #10 over the next week or so...

Deathwatch 2007: Another Laddie Mag Bites The Dust

Coming as no surprise to most in the industry, the new owners of recently purchased Dennis Publishing are going to fold in Stuff into Maxim as a regular section as of this upcoming holiday issue. Stuff was created as a buffer for powerhouse Maxim in a then highly combative "Laddie Mag" arena back in the late 90s/early 00s by eating up paging which might otherwise go to FHM and the like.

With the whole young men's category imploding faster than the Teen segment did a few years ago, Maxim's now the lone cowboy still standing in the frat-boy niche Details ignores and Esquire and GQ have a snowball's chance in hell of reaching.

Ah, Stuff, we hardly knew ye...

Deathwatch 2007: Tammy Faye Messner

It came as no surprise, but with sadness just the same. Tammy Faye Messner lost her battle with cancer on Friday morning, She was 65.

I was ten when the PTL scandal broke. I didn't really understand all the sorted details, but even a tween understood that they guy had had an affair with his secretary, she blabbed, he was investigated and found to have stolen a ton of cash from his church. What was fascinating to me was the scorned wife: her makeup, her drama, her staunch faith.

Twenty years later, she was on one of the many VH1 reality shows I am shocked to find myself loyal to (my current obsession with Rock of Love comes to mind). The Surreal Life pairs up a handful of misfits and D-Listers. Tammy's season was my favorite. She had a heart of platinum and a spunky soul. Godspeed, Tammy! I'll wear a few extra coats of Great Lash for you.

Brooklyn's Bravest

There are many things one would expect to find in the infamously toxic Gowanus Canal. Oil slicks? Sure. Dead bodies? Likely. Raw Sewage? Most definitely. Sea loving creatures? Yeah, right. And I bet you've got a bridge you'd like to sell me...


So, when I read on Curbed via Gowanus Lounge yesterday that a whale (yes, a real fucking whale!) had found its way into the Gowanus Canal, I thought it was a belated April Fools joke. But no, it's true!



See West 9th Street on the map where it meets the BQE? My apartment's a few blocks or so north of there and the fiesty baby Baleen whale currently hanging in "Gowanus Bay." I plan on stalking the little guy should he still be around this weekend, although considering the mass pollution of the water, part of me hopes he realizes his mistake and hauls ass outta there.


Source: Pics care of Gowanus Lounge, who's all over this story. Thanks, Rus!

UPDATE: Sadly, our Sludgie The Whale has passed into that great big ocean in the sky. We're going to miss the thought of the little guy.

Deathwatch 2007: Chumley's

It's a sad, sad day dear readers. At first, I didn't want to believe the breaking news on Gawker but the pictures and coverage on Curbed confirmed it.

A wall collapsed at 82-86 Bedford Street. Telling that address to a cabbie was the only way I could find myself to the mythical corner of Bedford and Barrow back when the West Village was still an unnavigable maze. From the moment my then boss took me and a coworker there after a Christmas Party, I was smitten. And who wouldn't be? We entered through the 'secret' side entrance into a single 22 year old female's dream: A dark smoke-filled room packed with young investment banker types.

Over the years, as the IB crush fad faded, I faithfully returned for the real charms of this former speakeasy. I fell in love with the jazzy jukebox, witty Ladies Room graffiti and peering through the window above the bar into the brownstone the place was tucked away in. Sipping a Heather's Honey under the watchful eye of Hemingway, Steinbeck and Woody Allen's portraits became a semi-regular weekend activity. Suggesting a Bitter Bulldog became a successful 2nd date mainstay.

True, I haven't been by in awhile, even though I now work only blocks from my former haunt, but I was devastated to hear of it's eminent demise. This afternoon Curbed reported a wall had collapsed and the FDNY and ConEd folks are likely tearing it down.

Oh Chumley's, you would truly be missed.

UPDATE: Official word from the Dept. of Buildings: "Earlier today, Buildings inspectors and engineers were called to assess structural damage to the building at 86 Bedford Street in Manhattan. The chimney at 86 Bedford Street separated from the interior wall and collapsed into the bar area. There were no injuries. Two buildings have been temporarily vacated pending the completion of theshoring work. The Red Cross is assisting with relocating the tenants. Buildings engineers have determined the building is not in danger of collapse. Demolition of the building is not being considered at this time." [CHUMLEY'S LIVES! ]

Deathwatch 2007: Gap Delivers The Smackdown

Forth & Towne, we hardly knew ye and that was the problem. In the past 18 months, Gap Inc. quietly rolled out a new chain targeting Baby Boomer women with a unique selling point of organizing the stores conservative goods into four sections: career, Chico-knockoffs, T-shirts and Jeans.

Sound like a place you (or your mother) would want to shop?

Apparently, you're not alone.

According to the Wall Street Journal, the stores never caught traction and were saddled with image and identity issues. They'll all be shutted by the end of March and the money reinvested into trying to help out the drowning Gap and Old Navy brands.

Oh, and about 550 employees will be "affected."

Deathwatch 2007: The Producers

Come April 22nd, The Producers will cease production after 2,502 performances. I was lucky enough to see this show when it first opened with it's Tony winning cast. I also saw it after Nathan and Matthew left and Brooks' script still had me crying with laughter.

While you mourn the loss of this bonafide Broadway super-hit, Z's already looking forward to it's St. James replacement in the Fall, also a Mel Brooks adaption. Two words: Young Frankenstein.