Z. Madison

For when you're relaxing at home or killing company time - Z. Madison's here for you.


File Under Genius

If this thing was outside my dorm in college, I definitely would have gained the infamous Freshman 15. As it was, our local late night drunk pizza hotspot was a respectable distance to wobble home from, at least providing a bit of exercise to work off those calories.

Enter the "Wonder Pizza." For a mere $5, you can vend yourself a piping hot pie with a choice of three toppings in 90 seconds or less. The machine holds 102 pies each in their own sealed container.

I imagine these things will start sprouting up all over college campuses and West 27th Street within weeks.

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Where's Waldo: Topps Edition

Funny "W" isn't a Yankee fan...

Bonus points if you can spot Mickey Mantle.

No cheating.

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Deathwatch 2007: Gap Delivers The Smackdown

Forth & Towne, we hardly knew ye and that was the problem. In the past 18 months, Gap Inc. quietly rolled out a new chain targeting Baby Boomer women with a unique selling point of organizing the stores conservative goods into four sections: career, Chico-knockoffs, T-shirts and Jeans.

Sound like a place you (or your mother) would want to shop?

Apparently, you're not alone.

According to the Wall Street Journal, the stores never caught traction and were saddled with image and identity issues. They'll all be shutted by the end of March and the money reinvested into trying to help out the drowning Gap and Old Navy brands.

Oh, and about 550 employees will be "affected."

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My favorite part of last night's uber-long (and dare I say it, a bit boring) OSCAR ceremony, other than the Gmail chat play-by-play by "Yellow Briefs," was Gore's anti-announcement egged on by Leo.

And host Ellen's observation that "There's no rhyme or reason to who's gonna win, how they figure these things out...Jennifer Hudson was on American Idol, America didn't vote for her, and yet she's here with an Oscar nomination. That's amazing, that's incredible. And then, Al Gore is here, America did vote for him...very complicated."

Kudos on the win, Al. Now about that announcement...

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Caption This:

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Deathwatch 2007: The Producers

Come April 22nd, The Producers will cease production after 2,502 performances. I was lucky enough to see this show when it first opened with it's Tony winning cast. I also saw it after Nathan and Matthew left and Brooks' script still had me crying with laughter.

While you mourn the loss of this bonafide Broadway super-hit, Z's already looking forward to it's St. James replacement in the Fall, also a Mel Brooks adaption. Two words: Young Frankenstein.

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Derek Jeter Quote Of The Day

"The only thing I'm not going to do is tell the fans what to do. ... I don't think it's my job to tell fans to boo or not to do." (during an interview peppered with questions about his relationship with ARod).

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It's Fat Tuesday, Y'all!

The freaks have come out in droves down in New Orleans for the annual Mardi Gras sendoff. Fat Tuesday is traditionally the all out brooha before Lent, which begins with Ash Wednesday tomorrow.

While missing the festivities down South, Z's still going to get my sin on at Union Hall tonight Park Slope style to see one of my favorite bands The Dansettes do their soulful thang.

The deets: $12 at the door. Doors at 6. Happy hour from 6-7.Louisiana cookin' donated by NoNO KITCHEN.Raffle prizes include a First Act electric guitar, Rangers tix, Le Tigre clothing, and music from Rounder Records.

Most importantly, the proceeds benefit Habitat for Humanity to help those affected by Katrina rebuild. So, if you're in the area, come on out and get your sin on for a good cause.

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Happy Presidents Day

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Yo, Adrien!

I have this friend we’ll call “Rocky.” Rocky and I met nearly eight years ago at a bar in Hoboken (don’t judge, I had friends who lived there at the time). Rocky and I hit it off right away and spent the night nurturing this connection. The highlight of the evening came when I visited the ladies room. Rocky was apparently so smitten and desperately needed alone time that he followed me into the bathroom to have some one on one time. Upon exiting the stall and noticing him there, it was only natural to kiss. It was a good kiss, which my protective, uber-aware, tall, dark and dreadlocked friend Ian rightfully broke up by dragging Rocky out of the bathroom with a “Oh Hell No!” forcefully by his arm.

Rocky and I proceeded to date for four or five months but we were both a little bored romantically with one another. The relationship, only consummated a couple of times, fizzled out to neither of our chagrins. It was truly a breakup for the record books. Neither of us were hurt.

Enter: friendship.

I’d never been able, no matter how many times I’ve promised otherwise, to continue/start a friendship with someone who’s been inside me, never mind someone I’ve cared about. I’m more of the Miranda in Sex And The City mindset: “We didn’t work out. Poof! You need not to exist anymore.” Something was different about Rocky.

A month or two after he crept out of my life, I got an email. He was looking to share with anyone a happy hour and I was looking for one, albeit broke. No worries, he was willing to treat. We met up and so began seven years of trading off the treating of get togethers, concerts, parties and other countless pseudo-dates. I became a good ‘wingman’ and even set him up with two of my best friends, I loved the guy so much. He became my bestest buddy. My go-to guy when it came to dating and the ‘what the fuck is up with men?” conversations. Simply, My Rocky. That’s how it continued, through various break-ups, jobs, apartments and life for the next seven years.

Then, we went out Saturday night.

Now, I should be upfront and state that upon receiving a call that he was watching the Syracuse/UConn game that afternoon meant that it would be a rough evening. I obliged the 7:15pm text that recommended “start drinking now”. We met up on the lower east side for drinks before heading to Arlene’s Grocery to catch a band he was hot on. On my end, the kettle one/tonics were flowing. On his: the Bacardi/diet cokes – he just went on the South Beach Diet. (Don’t bust his balls dear readers, I did far too much of that for both of us). We had our normal good debaucherous time.

As the band in question came on, we were stuck to the back of the room. Like Baby, nobody puts me in a corner, so I edged us 2/3 of the way to the stage where we held court throughout the set. About three or four songs in, I felt it. I was suddenly the recipient of a shoulder/neck massage. I felt nothing about it. Friends do this. But then it lasted a little (read: LOT) longer than I anticipated. Felt date-like. When I turned around to query, Rocky and I had what I’ll call “A Moment.”

We didn’t kiss. We almost did, but both repelled at the last moment. For the record, in that moment, I would have kissed/gone home with/married him. Instead, we got our coats and awkwardly bid adieu for the evening, me to a cab and him to Katz for a Ruben.

Awkwardly platonic text messages were then exchanged.

Me: “Btw, we were just in a weird place. We’re cool. Love u like a brother…”

Rocky: “Yes-totally-we r good!” There was also one following it calling me “Kiddo.”

In my cab home, (cue the “Carrie” voice) I got to thinking, could this work? I mean, he’s the Harry to my Sally, I love his family and friends, have seen and been seen at both our worst and best, makes me laugh, et al. He is, afterall, my Rocky!

This morning, head aching, my first thought was “but, he’s my Rocky!” After texting to make sure we’re both still alive and mutually not speaking to last night’s ‘moment’ ignored our almost insanity.

After all, he’s my Rocky and why would I want to screw that up?



Happy Chinese New Year!

It's the Year of the Pig, which is a lucky omen to our far eastern friends. So go get your pork on, dear readers.

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Damn, Marc's Looking Good

Looks like Marc Jacobs done did give himself a makeover. To the left is how we all know (and love) him. To the right was Mr. Vuitton at a London fashion show afterparty yesterday looking as hot as his new collection is bound to be.

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Godspeed Harry

Britian's Daily Mirror reported today that my favorite and feisty Royal, Prince Harry, will be deployed to Iraq by the end of the month. The Prince, in typical fashion, is likely taking the news in stride.

"Harry, who graduated last year from Royal Military Academy Sandhurst, said in a 2005 interview that he was keen to fight for his country.

'There's no way I'm going to put myself through Sandhurst and then sit on my arse back home while my boys are out fighting for their country.' " - AP

I know the 22 year old is well trained, but I can't help but to feel nervous at hearing this news. Maybe it's because he's about my little brother's age and I think of him in that way. It's silly to feel protective of a boy I've never met, I know, but I cannot help it.

Be safe, Harry.

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Oops, She Did It Again

File under WTF: A bald Britney Spears visited a tattoo palor in Sherman Oaks last night, shocking fans and photogs who gathered outside. Click here for pic links and a youtube.

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Friday Funny

My favorite nightly Dave Letterman schtick is Great Moments In Presidental Speeches. This one's a classic W befuddlement.

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Is It The 15th Yet?

So far today, I've received four things of chocolate (which I somehow convinced myself back in college that I don't like to eat and will randomly hand out to the security guys downstairs) and a dying little rose bush. All from sales reps. Oh, and an extra bagel from my coffee cart man who was caught up in the holiday spirit.

What did I not receive? A reply to an innocent text sent this morning to the guy I've recently been on a few dates with wishing him a "Happy Valentine's Day." Can I pick 'em or what?

Methinks a cocktail with co-workers is in order before making the slushy schlep home. Actually, it's more like a boozy dinner followed by a front row seat at (appropriately named) Loser's Lounge.

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Happy Valentine's Day

Wishing you and yours love and lots of laughs today, dear readers.

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Behold Harry

This confused looking mutt belongs to the king of Jello Pudding Pops and my surrogate father throughout the 80s, Mr. Bill Cosby. Harry, a Dandie Dinmont Terrior, is in the running to claim top prize at the annual fleafest known as the Westminster Dog Show being held in Madison Square Garden.

"The 6-year-old Harry is royalty in the show world and fittingly, he's named for Prince Harry. He's playful and a bit of a mischief maker -- much like his namesake." - CNN

Best In Show will be announced tomorrow and Harry is rumored to be a shoe-in. Why is it the fucked-up looking ones always win? I claim favoritism of the owner, who even with his fame and increasingly outrageous speeches belittling his own people in the past few years still make him 'normal' compared to his competition. I mean, have you ever watched these shows? Nothing but a bunch of obsessive freaks (in ill-fitting fashions and ugly shoes).

Who am I kidding? I love this shit and am still in mourning of Bravo's cancellation of Show Dog Moms and Dads.

(When I get my pug, you just know I'm going to enter the feisty little guy...)

Luck to Bill and Harry tomorrow!

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Thank You, Bernie

When Spring training begins next week, Bernie Williams will not report to Tampa to join the Yankees.

According to the Yankees website, the ever dedicated sportman said "he would remain at home and stay in shape, anticipating a call that could come from the Yankees at some point -- perhaps in the event of injury to one of the club's starting outfielders: Hideki Matsui, Johnny Damon and Bobby Abreu."

It's hard for me to imagine no #55 in the line-up, out in the outfeild or cheering on the team from the bench.

Thank you for the past sixteen years, Bernie. You've been an excellent role model and an incredible player. I'll miss you.

PS - Pitchers and catchers report on Tuesday...Let's Go Yanks!

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The Devil Is A Punk

Have you heard all the fuss about these two idiots? The rumors started swirling that the cat toting aristocrats were playing the fashionistas for a fool. Well, the cat's out of the bag as the fashion label Trovata admitted they hired the actors to basically crash all the shows and get photographed up the wazoo throughout Fashion Week.

How did the scam last so long? The Devil had a hand in it! That's right, Anna Wintour was in on it the whole time and even air kiss-kissed the pair in public lending instant legitimacy.

Oh, you saucy minx...

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Deathwatch 2007: Anna Nicole Smith

Guess we'll now find out who the Babydaddy is to poor little Danielynn...

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'Will Smith spoke today at the Motion Picture Association of America in Washington D.C. Mr. Smith told the crowd a hilarious story. It happened this morning on his way to the event. An older couple approached Smith and said, "We love what you're doing. You're so great for the country!" In true Hollywood fashion, Smith said, "Thank you!"As the star walked away, the old man said, "And we'll be sure to vote for you."'

Thx TMZ!

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I'm Obsessed With This Train Wreck

You just know this is going to be a movie of the week. It's Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan and Amy Fisher/Joey Buttafuco all rolled up into one. And, they're all astronauts!!!

"...Police, who located Nowak at a bus stop. They also found a wig and a plastic bag containing a carbon dioxide-powered BB pistol in a nearby trash can, the report said. Inside a bag Nowak was carrying, the officer found a tan trench coat, a new steel mallet, a new folding knife with a 4-inch blade, 3 to 4 feet of rubber tubing, several large plastic garbage bags and about $600 in cash.

Inside the car, police found an a half dozen latex gloves, MapQuest directions from Houston to Orlando International Airport, e-mails from Shipman to Oefelein, diapers Nowak said she wore to reduce stops along the highway and a letter indicating how much she loved Oefelein..."

This will be fun to watch unfold. I'll never look at astronauts in the same revered way again...


Congrats Colts

And congrats Tony Dungy for a well earned and deserved soggy SuperBowl Win.

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Superbowl Ad You Need To Watch Out For

Working in advertising, the Superbowl is more than just a game to me. I watch for the commercials as much as for the main event. The ad I'd set my tivo for this year stars KFed. I love that he's able to make fun of himself. Maybe I've underestimated him?

UPDATE: Other commercial highlights

*I really enjoyed the Late Night with David Letterman promo featuring 'lovebirds' Dave and Oprah

*Kudos to Revlon for having the guts to pony up with a spot directed to females. I used to work on L'Oreal hair color and always argued that 50% of the game's audience was female - why not put our ad on? Let's see if sales surge...

*The http://www.careerbuilder.com/ "Survivor" spots definitely stood out. Great creative idea.

*www.godaddy.com - Blatant T&A once again.

*The www.beatyourrisk.com heart health ad was definitely a standout.

*I'm digging the new Coke campaign and Bud had a few gems (dalmation, crab king)

Oh, and Prince's halftime show was genius.

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People Will Buy Damn Near Anything

Light up bras. For a mere $120, this little number can be yours.

"The lights fade up and down, back and forth, in a variety of soothing patterns."

This happens to be one of the "simple models" in the Enlighted collection. Light up panties are also available.

Valentine's Day is right around the corner lads. How about surprising your honey with one of these concoctions to let her know she really lights up your life? (sorry, couldn't help myself)

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That Most Special Time Of The Year

Marc Jacobs @ his holiday party last December

Wondering where all the anorexic model types and 4 Times Square editors have disappeared to? Why, Bryant Park, of course.

It's Fashion Week, dear readers!

There's over 100 shows to wow and wonder at for the next seven days and parties galore. For the complete schedule, backstage gossip and runway photos in abundance, click here.

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Because I Wish You Both Could Win...

I gave love to the Bears (care of the Superbowl Shuffle), so it's only fitting that I show some respect to Peyton and his boys.

Should be a helluva game.

Thx Troy for the youtube!

This Has Been Me The Past Week

I've finally worked out the gmail and ensuing blogger (a google entity) issues.

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