Here's Hoping I Can Afford To Test One Of These Puppies Out This Season

The new Yankee Stadium threw open it's doors yesterday and I must say...the place looks great.

Considering the average seat price is about $75, I'm not sure how often I'll be able to swing up to the Bronx to watch my boys in person. Methinks I'll be seeing most of the season on YES or on a stool at my local watering hole, Hanleys.

Hal Steinbrenner, the only sane one in the Steinbrenner clan, let it slip yesterday "Look, there's no doubt small amounts of our tickets might be overpriced."

Also, the last time I checked the sky is blue and water's wet, Captain Obvious.

Click here to see more of the House That Taxpayers Built.

Bob in '09?

Bob Sheppard in 1951

Bob Sheppard still doing what he's loved for, nearly 60 years later

When Yankee Stadium closed last September, more than just The House That Babe Built came to an end, I'm afraid.

Since 1951, Bob Sheppard has been the announcer for all home games. (You can hear him on the other side of the Hudson in the Meadowlands, too.) His voice is unique. Classic. Classy. As you can imagine, having done the job for nearly 60 years, the man has become a legend and as much a part of the game experience as the action on the field.

I've heard he's not been doing well. In fact, he didn't announce games live at all in 2008, rather he sent in recordings. I was hopeful he'd be back for this season, if only for opening day. He thought so, too. So it was with a heavy heart I heard his wife had told Newsday “he doesn’t have the stamina yet to go back at this time.”

Be well, Bob. Be well.

PS - Bob's Wikipedia has a lot of interesting information. Click here .

Oh A-Rod, You Make It Too Easy

Q: What's even better than the above picture of A-Rod making out with himself in a mirror?

A: The opening of Details' cover story accompanying the photo.

"The night before his life changes forever, Alex Rodriguez calls from Miami with an urgent request. A-Rod is worried about something he said during our interview last night. I've been hearing mysterious warnings all afternoon: Alex needs to talk. Alex wants to clarify something. Can't say what. Alex will call you from his car.

"Listen," Rodriguez says. "I was thinking about one thing that I spoke about—it's something that's kind of trivial but will give me a hard time for no reason." He pauses. "The song."

Aha. Last night, he let slip his favorite Madonna song. The curious relationship between A-Rod and the pop icon makes for delicious gossip, of course. Is Rodriguez terrified that Madonna will resent the tongue-wagging? Or, better still, has he picked the wrong song as his favorite, and fears that an offended Madge might march her stilettos over his back? No: Rodriguez believes that revealing the song would lead to its being played every time he stepped to the plate during an away game. "The last thing I want to do is go to every stadium and have them play that song," he says. Fine—to be honest, it's not even a great Madonna song (if it had been something juicy like "Justify My Love," forget it).

Looking back, his preoccupation seems surreal. Just the day before, Selena Roberts, a reporter from Sports Illustrated, had confronted Rodriguez at a Miami gym, asking for his reaction to evidence that he'd tested positive for illegal steroids in 2003. And now here he was, sweating a Madonna song. It's like worrying about the in-flight movie as your plane is belly flopping on the Hudson River..."

If you're like me and can't wait for the issue to hit newsstands, click here for the full article.

Happy 4th Of July

Last year I spent the 4th of July in London at a pub, sipping a pint of Stella and noshing on fish and chips. This year I'll be spending it the all American way: in the 'burbs at a backyard BBQ, sipping a Sam Adams Summer Ale and noshing on burgers and hot dogs while cheering on the Yanks vs that team from Boston.

Oh, and I'll also be trying not to blow off any digits or limbs lighting the fireworks procured legally last weekend in good old Pennsylvania.

Here's hoping you and yours have a wonderful and relaxing holiday.

Broken Wang

Just as things are finally starting to turn around for the Yanks and we can legitimatly eye a post-season run, we go and break our Wang.

Interleague play usually provides me with the opportunity to learn about a team I'd otherwise know nothing about as I don't follow the NL (that other NY team aside). If our series is on the road, it also offers the hiliarious sight of our pitchers at bat. Rarely do they do anything other than strike out, but they always do it in earnest.

Wang actually got a base hit in the sixth inning of yesterday's game. The other team forced the out at third base, allowing him to safely reach first and, to our detrimet, proove his poor base running skills. In an aggressive attempt to run from second to home, Wang noticebly gimped as he rounded third and practically collaseped in his teammates arms after crossing home plate. He had to be basically carried down the dugout stairs and into the locker room.

Fingers crossed it's just a sprain in his foot and not the much more serious (and season ending) Lisfranc ligament injury.

Get well soon, Wang!

"Rain, Rain, Go Away...

...come again another day" is likely what the clubhouse was singing as the home opener at the very last season in Yankee Stadium (how many times are we gonna hear that one this season) was called earlier today. So long as Mother Nature cooperates, the Bombers will kick off the season tomorrow night.

Go Yanks!

Pope Benny's Coming!

Next April, my favorite Prada wearing Pontiff will be visiting the Big Apple to speak to the UN, pay respects at Ground Zero and the like. The most important event on his itinery will come on April 20th (now now, keep your 4:20 jokes to yourselves...) when he celebrates Mass at Yankee Stadium.

As any fan will agree, after all the shakeups in the past couple of months (and lack of rings since 2000), it couldn't hurt to have the holiest of holies bless the joint with his presence at the start of the season. While he's at it, can he shake a little holy water on the construction site next door?

Dumpwatch 2007: Torre Tells Georgieboy To Stuff His Offer Where The Sun Doesn't Shine

After being left to twist in the wind, Torre slipped down to Tampa today and basically told Steinbrenner and Co. to fuck off, rejecting their $5MM one year deal (with bonuses for each round of playoffs secured) in the hour long meeting.

It's an end of an era to be sure. You gotta respect the guy for leaving with his dignity intact but the bench just won't be the same without him.

We'll miss you, Joe.

What's Bugging The Yanks?

Swarms and swarms of midges descended on Jacobs Field during the eighth inning last night in Game 2 of the ALDS, creating a new set of Joba Rules.

Rule #1: Teamwork Makes The Dream Work

Posada, ever the dependable teammate, sprays down The Sandman.

Rule #2: Be Aggressive. B-E Aggressive. B-E AGG-R-E-S-S-I-V-E.

Um, ARod? Where exactly are you spraying to make him smile like that?

Rule #3: There's No "I" In Team

But as The Captain shows, there is a feeling of woe is ME

Rule #4: Always Keep Your Cool

Proving stressful situations don't phase him, Joba gets some TLC from the Ump before walking two, hitting a batter and making two wild pitches.

I'm expecting frogs falling from a sky full of Ebbets Field raised flying pigs if after the Yanks get the fuck outta Cleveland and come home, they don't take Game 3 in The Stadium tomorrow night while The Boss is in attendance.

Hey Yanks Fans,

Anyone else feel they were watching Major League last night on TBS? Jesus fucking Christ!

At any point, I expected to see ARod throwing back shots of rum in a hopeful nod to Jobu while Torre purposefully pisses on his contract in front of George.

It's Hazing Time!

The fratastic annual tradition of Yankees Rookie Hazing has struck gold. I mean who wouldn't love seeing Joba as the Cowardly Lion??? How's it stack up compared to years past?


A far better attempt than the lame-ass 2006 Steinbrenners:

Better use of a cross dressing than Wang's ridiculously cute Cheerleading 2005 class:

A more concise theme than 2004's gaggle of Elvi:




Much more thought clearly went into the Ozfest than Matsui's 2003 Pimps:



And poor Chancon is all I gotta say about this hot mess:



Unfortunately, the annual practice was not enstilled the year Oh Captain, My Captain was a rook (you know, as the late 90s winning dynasty came into fruition with it's first playoff run in ages), so here's a wee-Jeter for you instead:


Carry on, boys. Carry on!

Deathwatch 2007: Holy Cow!

The Yankees confirmed today that Phil Rizzuto has passed on to that big game in the sky. He was 89 and remains a baseball legend both as a player (as a leadoff hitter and shortstop for the infamous 1940s/50s Yankee Dynasty) and as a broadcaster. The ever humble Scooter was finally admitted into Cooperstown in 1994 thanks to an persuasive plea from friend Ted Williams.

Besides running constant biographies et al on YES, I'll be curious to see how the Yanks honor #10 over the next week or so...

Talk About A Money Shot!

While I cannot wrap my mind around what their combined net annual salaries are, I know it's more than even I could possibly squander on the four corners of 57th Street and 5th Avenue. (Van Cleef, Blvgari, Bergdorfs and Tiffany's! Oh My!). I'm just curious as to when the newest and surprisingly shorter American Super-Athlete's going to earn his due. MLS musings aside, congrats must be bestowed on Mr. 500-Rod, a shout out given to fellow pinstriper Matsui (100 Career Home Runs) and that other New York team for Glavine's 300th Win.

Even though Yanks fans have been keenly eyeing the standings all season, now's the time of year all fans begin casting a nervous and watchful gaze at each league's division leaders while trying to keep up on the mathematical Wild Card scenarios (and I start dropping serious hints to my sales reps about tickets).

My take on the perfect playoff scenario would be for it to come down to the Cubbies (currently one game back in the Central Division) versus the still comfortably in the lead Mets for the National League Championship. Loyalty to my town would have me rooting for the Mets, but in that scenario a Cubbie clinch would warm my cold black heart. As for the American League - you gotta' ask? What better way for the Bronx to enter the World Series than by scratching out a scrappy seventh game win over BoSox Nation.

Ah, but we still have the dog days of Summer to slug through and 30 long days in September of watching and waiting. Play ball, boys. Play ball.

Welcome Back, Rocket!

Ever since the grandiose announcement Roger proclaimed from Steinbrenner's box a few weeks back, the eminent return of The Rocket seems to have lit a fire under his once-again teammates under preforming asses. Slowly, but surely, we're clawing our way from the basement towards taking on Boston for the AL East lead.

While I am not of the camp buying into Clemens being the Messiah of this season, I'm all for his return and will be waiting with baited breath for his start against Pittsburgh today.

Go Yanks!

Pinstriped Perp

I'll give the guy points for originality, but considering how things are going this season, it's only one more reason for a Yankees fan to hang her head in shame.

The dude the NY Post dubbed "A-Rob" walked into a bank in Fort Greene last week decked out in pinstripes and successfully robbed the joint before slipping away. You know, kinda how Chicago treated us last night.

And Where Will All The Fans Without Tickets Be At 1pm Today?

Hiding in their cubes/offices or a conference room with Cable Access.

It's opening day, Yankee fans! Regrettably, Andy Pettitte has been nursing a bad back and superstar Wang is on DL until late April, which leaves Pavano to open the season this afternoon.

Pavano!

A breeze would blow by this guy last year and he'd have to go on the DL list. Hell, the last time the guy even threw from the mound was June 27, 2005, having injured his shoulder, back, buttocks, elbow and ribs. Oh, and there's that pesky late night car crash he kept from the team...

But hey, if Mussina's OK with the guy now, so am I. Go Yanks!!!

Meet NY Baseball's Psychic...Er Lifecoach

Just in time for the kickoff to baseball season (Sunday for the Mets, Monday for the Yanks...cough, cough I suddenly feel like I'm coming down sick...), NY Magazine introduces us to Azra Shafi-Schelierini, a lifecoach most of the NY players can't live without.

Ron Darling was smitten and Giambi "'won’t go to the bathroom without her', jokes sports-insurance agent Richard Salgado."

My favorite part of the mini-article? This tidbit about Oh Captain, my captain:

"Why does Derek Jeter call you 'the Wiz'? When we met, he couldn’t pronounce my name. So it was 'Az.' That became the 'Wizard of Oz.' Then he shortened it."

Where's Waldo: Topps Edition

Funny "W" isn't a Yankee fan...

Bonus points if you can spot Mickey Mantle.

No cheating.

Derek Jeter Quote Of The Day

"The only thing I'm not going to do is tell the fans what to do. ... I don't think it's my job to tell fans to boo or not to do." (during an interview peppered with questions about his relationship with ARod).

Thank You, Bernie

When Spring training begins next week, Bernie Williams will not report to Tampa to join the Yankees.

According to the Yankees website, the ever dedicated sportman said "he would remain at home and stay in shape, anticipating a call that could come from the Yankees at some point -- perhaps in the event of injury to one of the club's starting outfielders: Hideki Matsui, Johnny Damon and Bobby Abreu."

It's hard for me to imagine no #55 in the line-up, out in the outfeild or cheering on the team from the bench.

Thank you for the past sixteen years, Bernie. You've been an excellent role model and an incredible player. I'll miss you.


PS - Pitchers and catchers report on Tuesday...Let's Go Yanks!